Ellen Page always struck me as a lesbian. When Juno came out in 2007, she assured her fans she was just a tomboy. And then in 2014 she dated women and came out as a lesbian. The LGBTQ community just rolled their eyes and said, “duh.”

And fast-forward to 2020, Ellen is Elliot.

Don’t get me wrong – I do not condone judging people’s private lives. Being ill at ease in your skin is debilitating physically and psychologically, and all people should be given the freedom to find and be themselves. If that means wearing a dress, so be it. Heck, I’m all for people being free to wear little to nothing if they so choose. We’re fortunate to have the technology and medical know-how to physically change genders, and if that’s what you’d like and you can afford it, go for it.

In this ABC News personal essay, Elliot reads passages from his memoir Pageboy and speaks to the camera about his life experiences. He expresses his joys and fears, and how he felt masculine as a young person though he was molded to be feminine. He talks about the anxiety of living untruthfully and the lightness following his big coming out event.

Elliot faces the camera in his brown polo shirt and slacks, and he looks happy. He glows when he smiles. He looks confident. He says he feels joy and truly alive.

I’m embarrassed to say that as the interview is playing on half my screen, I’m googling on the other side things like “Elliot page wife” and adding “2023”. There’s a gossip site that is suggesting Elliot is dating Mae Martin, and I’m wondering whether Mae identifies as male or female. Why does it matter? Love is love, and if and how Elliot and Mae do the dirty isn’t any of my business.

None of that should matter to any of us.